Rough edit down of 'The Car Chase Story', I haven't normalized or done anything special with this, just cut it down crudely.
normally this story runs over a half hour I had him tell it in 8 and now its been cut down to five.
Let me know what you think in the story is expendable and what isn't.
Not sure if I'll stay with this, If i do i will be adding myself talking about the person telling it and sound effects will be added.
This is a very crude draft right now.
Sadly, as much as I love a naked man in a story, I think it could go, it doesnt have bearing on the chase. The sound is nice and clean, but are your levels a little low? I liked the chimp, but it was a bit abrupt. I agree with your instincts to add some effects, well, texture anyway. The part about him being a cop is a great ending.
ReplyDeleteVan,
ReplyDeleteI think the levels could be a bit higher and this story could definitely benefit from more voices (yours, talking about him if that's wear you're going with this) and effects for "texture" (as Michelle said). I'd like to see where you could take this piece with a little more work.
Hmmmm...so I'm not really sure what could be cut out. But I know that it is too long. You will just have to think about what is necessary for the story and then get rid of whatever isn't. I know this is not an easy thing because I am currently undergoing the same process myself. I also agree with the previous posts that it needs more variation sonically. Good luck.
ReplyDeletei was kind of confused by all the people in the story. i like the parts where the speaker imitates other people...the image of the naked old man in superman pose seems to good to lose haha.
ReplyDeletei'd suggest editing down...not really sure where...but...yeah. the chimp sound seems out of place, esp cos you don't have many other sounds like it/sound effects in general.
also, i would end it at: "beat me at the side of the road."
Van,
ReplyDeleteI'm curious to hear where you take this next. Your right that it's too long and needs more sonic variation. Like the other posts indicate it's hard to follow all the characters and understand what to feel about them.
Going out on a limb here... I suspect the real story is not the story itself, but what this particular teacher and his animated story of teen hijinks meant/means to you.
Your voice leading us along, adding commentary, giving us "signposts" could make this a really rich audio piece.
Keep going....
stephanie